This is the Cheatham County Sheriff’s Report for March 18, 2022, provided by the Sheriff’s Office.
There’s so much to tell and no time to explain it all because it’s a complicated county with twists, turns and the occasional sinkhole. The job of protecting keeps your servants on their toes.
Every call is an adventure and nothing can be considered routine, even when it involves bacon grease being used as a deadly weapon, roosters going on a stabbing rampage, or cats trying to scratch the eyes out of nervous Fed-Ex package throwers.
Last weekend’s three-inch snow blizzard caused slipping, sliding and bald-tired jalopies being abandoned. Sorry, weary drivers who walked away from their sleds. We had to do some towing.
Another week of overdoses causing families wrecked with grief and pain. One person was dying in a parking lot the very moment his saviors arrived. Fast, forcible entry into his vehicle followed life saving techniques that brought him back. Watching a generation poisoning themselves to death plagues all first responders with an enduring stress no one wants to carry.
Notice to drivers who have a revoked driver’s license operating a vehicle with one tail light, one headlight, a bumper scraping the pavement, causing sparks and giving the finger at a passing deputy while his fat doobie dangled. Don’t be that dude.
A convicted felon armed with guns was captured this week. Deputies are always on the hunt to protect you and let every bad guy know we don’t take kindly to imbecile criminality,
“What we’re dealing with is a complete lack of respect for the law”-Sheriff Buford T. Justice.
Road rage incidents are on the rise everywhere including Cheatham. Most occur on the interstates in every county, along with ours. Sometimes, mad idiots brandish firearms, as what happened on I-24 this week.
If you encounter an erratic moron, do not be that macho man by wagging your junk out the window like a dog’s tongue flapping in the wind. That’s what causes rear-ending wrecks and disfigurements.
A DAY IN THE LIFE OF AN SRO DEPUTY:
- Out assisting with an irate student.
- Monitored students arrival
- Perimeter checks and interior doors double-checked
- Took a group out to raise the flags.
- Teacher reported her laptop missing, found in the library.
- Helped a student whose truck broke down in the parking lot.
- Found a kid with a vape in the bathroom.
- Conflict resolution with kids wanting to fight.
- Talked to a student about outbursts of anger and how to make better choices.
- Located a student who damaged an industrial toilet seat. Turned out to be an accident.
We are invested for the long haul in their future and hope one troubled child will become a good person because of that certain SRO who cared about them…
Have a good weekend, good people because good will prevail over evil. Your servants will see to it.
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